November 29, 2006

MA...

Once upon a time she was a bubbly pampered sister of three elder brothers, who loved handiwork, going to movies, dressing up, painting, playing pranks and her cats. And then she got married to become a wife at 18. Then one day she had ME and became a mother at 20. A few years later, she eventually had my two younger sisters and added to the list of things she previously was. She became a cook, a dresser, a wiper of our dirty faces, a cleaner of our soiled diapers, a nurse when we were ill, a retriever of thrown socks and uniforms, a finder of our lost shoes, a doer of our homework we couldn’t complete, an insomniac. She was a referee in our toy-wars, a slayer of dragons in our nightmares, the face of angels in all those fairy-tale bed-time stories that she’d read out to us every night before tucking us in bed to sleep. She was the expert innovative chef who had to come up with 1001 tiffin-recipes which could not be repeated very often, a duty-bound guard who would walk us to school and bring us back home, holding the umbrellas to protect us from the sun or the rains and sometimes even carry one of my sisters who would get tired walking. She was a soother of nervous school jitters, a coach to prepare us for our tests and exams, a strict (hate-able) character when we scored poor marks, an adorable rewarder when we passed with flying colors and a sporty leader of girl-scouts.

With each passing day, her talents grew: she became a baker of delicious cakes and cookies, a hygienic competitor of the dirty roadside chaat-wala, an ice-cream vendor who distributed popsicles and ‘milkmaid-kulfis’ not only to us but to all our neighborhood playmates absolutely free-of-cost. She learnt to sew prize-winning costumes for our fancy-dress competitions, compose the best school essays which would score us maximum marks in the whole class, come up with the best ideas for our science exhibition projects and embroider the most beautiful motifs for our hand-work assignments. She would be my transporter, guide and motivator for all those numerous art-competitions that I participated in as a child.

Her body, once which was her own to do with it as she pleased, now belonged to us—she ate for ‘us’ when she was carrying us in her womb, her breasts were the only source of food or life we recognized as infants, her shoulders were used by us to cry upon, her arms to be hugged by whenever we needed her warmth and security, and her lap for us to sit and cuddle upon. Her lips became the kissers and soothers for all our unstoppable boo-hoos and tears, her hips were the carrier of our small, squirmy bundles and her hands our cradle.
She could braid or tie-up our hair in the time most people could only manage to wash their faces. She could bathe, dress, feed and get all the three of us ready for school in half-an-hour flat. And she could smile for us even when she didn’t actually feel like. Her feet were used to walk the house with us in her arms at any hour of the night, if either one of us had a difficult time sleeping due to illness or nightmares. And as we were growing up, she even grew eyes in the back of her head and her hearing became supersonic--lest we should fall into wrong things or wrong people at a wrong age.

Her parents had named her ‘Mina’. Then as she became a mother she had as many aliases as a conman. She became—at various times—Mm, Ma, Ma-ma, Mom, Mommy, Mummy, Mum, Mina-ma (I used to call her that, as if to distinguish her as the special one of the various other moms in the neighborhood, she recalls) and for a brief period of her mental vexation, ‘Mins’ (when we called her that teasingly).

Her free time which might have once been occupied to do things of her interest, were now used to tidy the disorderly jumble of our toys, books, empty chips packets, used plates, empty cans of cold-drinks, a carpet of clutter and chaos and a dwelling of disarray.

Her mind which might have once flourished with egocentric thoughts, were sometimes filled with irrational ideations: “What if they fall out of the bed while I’m in the kitchen?” “What if they choke on their food?” “How safe would they be to get back home after dark from their friends’ birthday party?” “What if they choose the wrong guys as their boyfriends or to get married to?” “Did I say anything to hurt my darlings?” “Am I a good mother?” “How will I know if I’m falling short of anything in bringing them up?” etc… These were some of her insecurities I would overhear her sharing with Dad, once in a while when he was home (my dad had to travel a lot due to the nature of his job and he was hardly home till we grew up).

But for us three sisters, my Ma has been and always will be our ideal icon… even more important and loveable than God himself, coz she’d done something nobody else had ever done for us… accomplished a feat so death-defying and magical that many wouldn’t even attempt doing. She’s the one and only form, face, smell and name of pure and unselfish love I’d ever known. She’s my Ma….

41 comments:

Vaibhav J said...

MA, it means everything to all of us, its her bcoz of whom we r we what we r today.
U really made me cry baby, it all relates to everyones life so closely, but do they all really realise the greatness of this icon .... even more important and lovable than good himself? I miss my MA .... and i wanna thank her for all that she has done for me and my sisters and i will give my parents all the happiness they deserved but always sacrificed for r happiness. I miss u mums and papa ....

Keshi said...

OMG this is truly beautiful. What a heart-felt dedication to a lovely lady in ur life. Mina is a lovely name!

My Ma is my whole life. Without her I wudnt live.

Keshi.

Anonymous said...

"Her body, once which was her own to do with it as she pleased, now belonged to us".....one line which says it all

Anonymous said...

I see you still have a thanksgiving hangover

ps : No need to thank me for this post

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

Anon: was not going to thank u anyway, but I was wondering what kind of an insensitive person wud it take to leave a comment like the one u left. There need not be an occassion for anyone to miss their mother or a special moment to say 'thanx' or 'i love u' to HER. Whoever u r, I really doubt if u love or actually know your mother's worth. Start NOT taking her so much for granted....

Anonymous said...

guess you write with your heart... small wonder you touch hearts! your ma article was inspiring enough to call my mom and tell her how much i love her... i know sounds mushy and filmi but then it mattered a lot to her... well, this is getting a lil too long for a comment! i guess you deserve a golden pen. take care and let the words flow... suraj

Anonymous said...

Hey its me the "insensitive guy" again

I wasnt taking anything from you .Your post is a very heart touching one .

I just happened to pass by your blog , read your blogs .You have some obvious talent . But all you writing is nothing but a big thank you card . Hence the pun .

Lastly , personally i don't feel the need to thank someone i guess its explicit in the way i treat them

And ya if my mom would have still been with me i wouldn't have taken her for granted . Ciao

PS : whatever

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

VAIBHAV: Yes, we often tend to take our parents so much for granted & go on demanding things without keeping in mind their likes and dislikes. And I thought it wud be good to express my feelings and say I LOVE U to my Ma thru this blog just like that, without waiting for an occassion like THANKSGIVING or her BIRTHDAY or MOTHER's DAY.

KESHI: So true. Without my MA I wudn't have known how to be the person I am today. She is my everything...

ROY: Hats off to your dedication too. How have u been dude?

SHERRIFF: I jus tried to sum it up, but its truely not enuf and words really can't suffice what our parents...especially what our mothers have done for us...

SURAJ: Thanks that my article has made u tell your mom how much u love her. No, it doesn't sound 'filmy' at all. Don't we all feel good with a little appreciation and the occassional 'i love u's once in a while from our near and dear ones even though we know how they feel. It really makes a difference to let our close ones know how much they mean to us,once in a while...
Oh, btw, I think I know who u r and where u came from to this site... 'She' told me about U...

ANON: Thats alright, whatever said and done, I just felt u were being sarcastic in your first comment and I cudn't take it in a good spirit as these r not just my scribbles...these r my feelings for some things in my life I feel for so strongly. No,I don't think all of my posts are 'thank-u' notes. But as they come straight from my heart,it does not really matter even if they sound or seem like thank-u notes. I don't have any ego hassles in saying THANK U or SORRY to anyone if they deserve it. After all,these words r FREE and mean a lot...like all the other simple things in life...

burf said...

absolutely

she is the best

no amount of words cud be more or less

Sudeep said...

wonderful... u know i luv ur long posts dedicated to specific person in ur life.

Sudeep said...

n suddenly i m humming the song..
very old one..
Usko nahi dekha humne kabhi par iski jaroorat kya hogi.. eh maa teri surat se alag bhagwan ki surat kya hogi

now i will go home n give mom a big hug

Anonymous said...

heck! i ve been betrayed! my cover is blown!

Minal said...

..a little late for comments yet just read your post and found it extremely touching.

keep writing

Anonymous said...

...and btw, i think you should turn professional!

Anonymous said...

Very, very nicely written...a pleasure to read :)

Jay Sun

(http://moirealitybites.blogspot.com/)

Saurabhi said...

"accomplished a feat so death-defying and magical that many wouldn’t even attempt doing. She’s the one and only form, face, smell and name of pure and unselfish love I’d ever known. She’s my Ma…"

babes where do u get all this from?? U made me cry after such a long time! these words r so true in all respect!
We guys really need to behave ourselves now..esp 'me' the way we take our parents 4 granted! I think this is one of the best blogs in "Just a few scribbles"..your words are much more beautiful than yourself! truly!

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

BURF: Thanks for feeling the same way..

SUDEEP: Thanks that u like them dude. I have been reading your posts regularly but cant leave my msgs of appreciation as u upgraded to beta blogger. My comments are not accepted any more. I feel so under previledge...SOB!!

SURAJ: Dont worry, I dont think U r the same SURAJ I was talking about. Your identity is still a secret. (Me dissappointed). Hey, U really think I'm that good to turn into a professional? Nah! I dont think so....yet....

MINAL: Long time, girl. Was missing U...

JAY SUN: Thanks for coming by. C U around...

SAURABHI: Thanks for the appreciation babes. But I still feel I can't come up with the right words, phrases, expressions or appreciations to do justice to this most important person in my life. I wudn't be what I am today without her....

kaushik said...

Its coool..very sentimental. U write really well.....

Anonymous said...

Phew for my identity still intact and yep for turning pro! i am an advertising professional (that's a clue) my comment therefore qualifies. and come to think of it...there is a major demand for writers!

Anonymous said...

can arrange good assignments but for the distance!!!

Saurabhi said...

babes.. know its kinda difficult to express our feelings in words..but I loved every bit of it..trust me :o)

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

Thats an awesome awesome post dedicated to mom...seriously

she recalls) and for a brief period of her mental vexation, ‘Mins’ (when we called her that teasingly).
This shows the closeness you share with your mom...this is really cute...I liked it....

I spoke to ma mom...my weekly call back home...and as always she started crying n all...I dont know how to react to it..I cant tell her that I'm missing here out here, coz it was ma decision in the end to come n settle down at a far off fplace...at times it hurts me a lot...

Anyway...greeetzzz!!

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

KAUSHIK: Thanks for coming by...

SURAJ: Whr r u based? Pls get me some assignments if u can sometimes. But only clean stuff. I want the dough but the industry is ugly inside...

SAURABHI: thanks babes...

ARZ000N: I really like it when men act like they do with their mothers...even tough & strong men. That happens with me too. When I tell my ma sometimes even by mistake that I'm missing her or of any difficulty that I' facing without her, she just asks me to return home...hee,hee!!

anumita said...

Lovely post! Your mom should read this! She's be so proud of you!

Anonymous said...

me in Bangalore... dunno why you think that way but advertising is one of the cleanest profession priyanka... all i can say is you've been misinformed. work isnt a problem... lemme work out the modalities.

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

ANUMITA: Thanks girl. Thats a huge compliment. Ya, I'm hoping to take a printout of it to show it to my ma when I go home this time. My dad was very touched to read the post on his village-NAAMTI.

SURAJ: No, I don't mean advertising is a bad line. But my experiences in the modelling line has been very unpleasant most of the times. People in this industry generally want to label the models and try to use them. And with so many young girls in modelling competing with each other for the limelight, most of them don't actually mind going to any extent to bag an assignment. Thats why I have just kept this as my part-time interest and have a regular job to fall back to so as to be selective in the work I want to take up... Hope u got me...

Anonymous said...

hey! i have your yahoo id listed in my messenger... now me wondering how!?! could you check if my yahoo id (suraj_works) is listed in yours....

experiences... yeah i know some models get a raw deal till they make a name... also know a few artdirectors and photographers who do take advantage... but then those types are few and far between and then again you shouldnt judge the entire ad fraternity based on a few bad eggs...and besides going by your aptitude you just might end up being an adgirl yourself... and in that case i sure as hell know that you wouldnt take advantage of young guys! would you?!

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

SURAJ: I don't have your yahoo id in my mail list because I'm not into chatting (no computer no internet at home). I don't want to go in the ad line as I'm interested in very typical things. But whatever line I choose to be in, I work with a set of principles which does nt allow me to do certain things beyond my own laid down rules....

Anonymous said...

hey priyanka!
firstly, the last line in the second paragraph of my earlier comment was in a lighter vein. Sorry if that sounded serious coz i didnt mean it to be!

Secondly, it was my mistake to have made assumptions about you! so, sorry again!

Thirdly, I am unable to understand your stance... that is, are you interested in commercial writing or not?!

Lastly, Do i have your permission to mail some details to your personal ID. coz i wouldnt want to post it here since this is a public domain.

PS:It still is a mystery as to how your id is featured in my messenger list?!?!

PS-2:When's your next article due?

Minal said...

Just came by to check if something new

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

Suraj: Yes. go ahead and mail me. I appreciate your decency to ask permission. But hey, I really don't know when I'll post a next article. Not been too well of late and too many things at hand. Will try to put up something soon. Hey, ofcourse I'm interested in commercial writing but I hesitate due to the risk factor. But maybe I should start freelancing. What do u say???

Anonymous said...

Hey priyanka, just happen to stumble upon your blog through some other blogs.... you write so well !!! and this post of yours is is is........ i don't know how to say !!!!! great going dear :)

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

ROOMA: Thanks for coming by and liking my writeups. I'll come by your blog now. But just in case u r a beta-blogger, wont be able to leave comment. C u around...

KAUSHIK: Hey I checked your blogsite and your SHAIRIs are quite impressive. Just cudn't leave comments becoz of the beta-version...Take care...

Vikas ( Vicky) said...

well written...i think that its frist time i visited yor blog...
Ma..Mum....mom...mumm..mummy...
thats wonderful.....
U know i have just one girl friend in my life...thats my lovely Mom...

many times i thought to write abt the same topic...did not start ever...coz was scared that will miss one or other part, which someone else will be expecting...

keep writting

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

Vikas: hey thanks dude. That's really sweet that your Mom's your only gf...lucky woman she is....

Anki said...

priyanka indeed heart touching!kudos!

Keshi said...

heyya hows u girl? :)

Keshi.

Poo said...

MAA.....

A Mother's love is something
that no on can explain,
It is made of deep devotion
and of sacrifice and pain,
It is endless and unselfish
and enduring come what may
For nothing can destroy it
or take that love away . . .
It is patient and forgiving
when all others are forsaking,
And it never fails or falters
even though the heart is breaking . . .
It believes beyond believing
when the world around condemns,
And it glows with all the beauty
of the rarest, brightest gems . . .
It is far beyond defining,
it defies all explanation,
And it still remains a secret
like the mysteries of creation . . .
A many splendoured miracle
man cannot understand
And another wondrous evidence
of God's tender guiding hand.

This is for you :)) I have not written it, i am not a good at writing poems ....

Priyanka Mahanta Pandiyan said...

Ankita: Thanks.

Keshi: I was just a little blue because of the cold weather... I get very depressed in winters. But planning to take off to a nice sunny place and soak in some sun. Shud be fit and in high spirits by the time I return back on the New Year's.

My Life: That was really sweet, girl. Went thru your blogs. Really cute collection. C U around..

indicaspecies said...

Beautifully testimonial to thank your Ma. Excellent writing. I recalled my few words of appreciation to my Mama in my posting entitled 'Nostalgia.' Keep writing, I shall return. Cheers :)

indicaspecies said...

Beautifully expressed testimonial .. (bah..proof read before publishing indica :P)