Out of the blue, I remembered some people and started missing them... people who used to be my very good friends at one point of time, but who I have lost touch with or chose out of my life because of some difference or the other... people who have wronged me... people who I mis-understood... people who have just been out of touch all these years... people who couldn't take in an honest feedback about themselves... people who had fallen in love with me but I didn't... people who I had been in love with, but could never tell them... people who had been there for the moment without any benefit or harm and just vanished out of my life's chapter... people who I just couldn't fit into my life any longer... people who meant so much at one point of time that I thought I couldn't just live without them but I'm still living... people who I had lost to time, space or death... people who meant so much... people who meant so little... and people who made no difference at all... people who I lost and found and lost again... people who taught me to live... people who gave me pain... people who showed me how to laugh and be happy... people who taught me some simple pleasures and truths of life... people who I have fought with like a bitch... people I have played with as a child... people who played a great role in moulding me into the person I am today... people who were just being their own...
Suddenly I felt all alone and wanted to reach out to all of them with a heartful of love and arms full of hugs. I felt that if I died in my sleep, I would never ever be able to tell them that its alright... maybe I was wrong at times too... that, I would want to say 'sorry' for any wrong I have done or said or if I hurt them without knowing... that, it would be so much more beautiful to be friends again rather than being enemies or to have negative vibes with each other...
... and in the midst of such heavy thinking, the 'beer' took over and put me into a deep dreamless sleep....
8 comments:
And how do you feel today? Still the same about all of them like you did yesterday?
Anumita: Well,yes. Sometimes the reality strikes you at a moment you least expect. I still feel the same but I wonder how to handle the future impacts if I implement the same. The IFs and BUTs of life which always stops me... I don't even know if this is making any sense to you...
ever given vodka a try?
Saurabhi: No, baby. I do not usually think too much but somehow that nite it was different... Maybe I was subconsciously thinking of all these things.
Virus: Red-wine, Vodka and Rum are my favourite winter drinks, but I stick to Beer during summers. Usually take Haywards5000 but never had this effect. Kingfisher Strong took me by surprise...
Btw, thanks for liking my pics. Manish (the photographer) really worked hard on them.
i think you must been stressed out at work. it has happened to me once in a while. there are some friends that i wondered about. oh well, life is about growing up and learning from your mistakes.
Madhu: I do not know if I left any imprint on your memory at all, but you surely figure in very similar thoughts of mine. We met by chance in Guwahati and disappeared from each others lives almost as suddenly as we'd appeared...but I remember you whenever I think of my time in Ghy, and thank you for all those sweet moments (probably the only ones for me) we shared.
btw, you look absolutely fab..what a change.. you look 2 years younger than what you looked 10 years ago.
Okies, here's hoping you can figure out who this is:)
ps: i went through all your blogs to make sure it is you. sorry for playing the detective, but i just had to!
KINGFISHER STRONG.... is a gud read.
i wonder how would a hayward 10000 work on u...
MADHU: Ofcourse I remember u, girl. Infact, I also remember those bindaas days when we used to hog so much on all those 'pork-momos' and have extra pieces of fish or eggs than our normal share, remember? Those were some of my best days....except for the last big mess-up I did....
RONJOY: I wonder the same...though Hayward 5000 didn't have this kind of an effect...ever...
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